Tara Fields, Ph.D, L.M.F.T who maintains a clinical practice who treats individuals and couples from her private practice in Northern California. With 28 years of experience, Dr. Tara Fields is also the author of The Love Fix:Repair and Restore Your Relationship Right Now, a relationship book that helps couples repair conflict and create more loving relationships.
A simple yet effective way to make a relationship with a partner more intimate is to begin by asking questions about the day’s events when you both return home. Before detailing the things that happened over the course of your own day, focus first on asking about your partner’s day.
You can begin with a broad question, such as simply asking “how was your day?” Use your partner’s response to then ask more specific questions that show you pay attention, such as “how did the meeting go” or “the talk with my mother?”. The most important aspect of this love fix exercise is to listen closely to what your partner is saying and ask questions that show that you are authentically both present interested and aware of the highs and lows in their world. It is also important not to insist on having “me” time the moment that your partner walks in the door. First simply offer a kiss or hug and allow your beloved some transition time. He or she may want to change clothes first and settle in for the evening. Giving your partner some space and waiting until they have had a bit of “me” time to relax before asking about the day’s events will pre-empt conflict and create a healthy transition into quality “we” time.
A simple yet effective way to make a relationship with a partner more intimate is to begin by asking questions about the day’s events when you both return home. Before detailing the things that happened over the course of your own day, focus first on asking about your partner’s day.
You can begin with a broad question, such as simply asking “how was your day?” Use your partner’s response to then ask more specific questions that show you pay attention, such as “how did the meeting go” or “the talk with my mother?”. The most important aspect of this love fix exercise is to listen closely to what your partner is saying and ask questions that show that you are authentically both present interested and aware of the highs and lows in their world. It is also important not to insist on having “me” time the moment that your partner walks in the door. First simply offer a kiss or hug and allow your beloved some transition time. He or she may want to change clothes first and settle in for the evening. Giving your partner some space and waiting until they have had a bit of “me” time to relax before asking about the day’s events will pre-empt conflict and create a healthy transition into quality “we” time.